I’ve never really understood how words can be labeled as “bad.” To me, words are simply the verbal tools we use to express information, emotion and sentiment. For the life of me, I can’t figure out why some words are
I’ve never really understood how words can be labeled as “bad.”
To me, words are simply the verbal tools we use to express information, emotion and sentiment. For the life of me, I can’t figure out why some words are considered “bad,” other than the fact that somebody told me they were at a very young age.
On its own, no word can be “bad.”
Punching someone in the face? Bad.
Making a sound come out of your voicebox and forming your mouth a certain way? Not bad.
We’ve been pre-conditioned to have a reaction when we hear these explicit words, and it has worked. We react differently to hearing someone curse.
Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we gasp, sometimes we shake our heads.
I have to admit, I definitely have what could be called a potty mouth. When I’m in a remotely comfortable social environment, some four-letter words make up a high percentage of my vocabulary.
That could mean I’m not very creative, or that I’m a lazy conversationalist. I accept both of these as possibilities, but it is what it is. I do curse a lot.
Maybe it’s partly because I grew up in New Jersey, where Sopranos-style speak is pretty widely accepted.
To me, there has never been anything offensive about expressing emotion through any words. I certainly wasn’t raised to be cursing constantly, but I also wasn’t raised to think that four-letter words make someone a bad person. So when I got to a point where some words just seemed to fit the emotion I was trying to express, I’d say them, even if they might be considered taboo.
However, I also acknowledge that not everyone feels the same way I do, and that using these words in various settings is not acceptable. A busy office, a job interview, some family functions, a wedding toast (unless you’re George Costanza); these are situations where it’s not only preferred to avoid the four-letter family, it’s pretty easy, as well. Any time you have your guard up a bit, you’re likely to keep it clean.
I also know that many people take this much further and feel profanity in any context is inappropriate and offensive.
I’ve been having this debate in my head as the result of the numerous letters to the editor we have received following Kaua‘i High School’s decision to bring in a new football coach. There has been a large number of e-mails accounting for both points of view.
High schools have every right to make coaching decisions on whatever criteria they see fit, of that much I am certain. So if they feel that cursing is something that should not be tolerated, they should base their decisions with that belief in mind.
When I sat back and tried to think about whether or not my various coaches had cursed a lot, I literally couldn’t remember. This doesn’t mean they all had clean mouths, because I can picture them going off, but their actual word usage hasn’t stayed with me to that extent.
Coaches carry a lot of power and authority, sometimes with an impact — both good and bad — they may not comprehend at the time. I’ve seen coaches do pretty severe damage to their players’ psyche while keeping all their language perfectly clean. So the specific words are rarely the real issue.
Working for a school as a coach can be an odd hybrid because it is a job, but it is also athletics. On the basketball court, I’d say about half the words that come out of my mouth would be considered vulgar to some. Many who are around sports a lot of the time are the same way.
But for a coach, they are in that environment while also working a job. Not only a job, but working for an educational establishment. It can make for a confusing mix.
I’ve played with some of the KIF basketball players during pick-up games on the North Shore. In that environment, is it my responsibility to make certain my language is clean? I’m not saying my responsibility as far as having to answer to anyone, but is it my moral responsbility?
I haven’t come up with a good answer to that one. I personally don’t think I do, but these kids are the same age as kids high school coaches are supposed to be careful around, so what’s truly different?
We are taught that words have power, which is obviously true, as demonstrated by countless horrific events throughout history. But no one word or group of words can be damaging without some sort of negative intent behind it.
I’ve always believed that the intent should be the focus, rather than the audible sounds.
