LIHU‘E — Much like it’s tough to find someone whose family or close circle of friends hasn’t been touched by cancer, the same thing can be said for suicides. Editor’s Note: This is the second of a three-day series on
LIHU‘E — Much like it’s tough to find someone whose family or close circle of friends hasn’t been touched by cancer, the same thing can be said for suicides.
Editor’s Note: This is the second of a three-day series on suicide. The first day of stories appeared Sunday. The third part will be in Tuesday’s edition of The Garden Island.
LIHU‘E — Much like it’s tough to find someone whose family or close circle of friends hasn’t been touched by cancer, the same thing can be said for suicides.
A high school classmate of mine, whom we later found out was also a heroin addict, committed suicide before our graduation.
Broaching this delicate subject recently in the newsroom, a co-worker revealed that a relative of hers had died by suicide. Another colleague had a high school classmate who died by suicide before graduation. Seemingly all have been impacted by this issue in some form or another.
Another young Kauaian recently died by suicide prior to his high school commencement exercises. When word of that death reached a recent sporting event, his classmates’ reaction was likened to being gunned down by an assault rifle as the students literally rolled on the ground in agony and tears.
Years ago when I was still single and living in Kalaheo, two good friends on a men’s basketball team I played on died by suicide, both the result of failed relationships with girlfriends, as I understand it.
Later it became twistedly ironic that the team was called the “Kalaheo Dirt Movers.” My jersey is interred with one of the young men, as all of us wore our jerseys to the funeral and tossed them into the grave before dirt was moved to cover the coffin.
One of the deceased friends was a shooter extraordinaire, and between him and the other starting guard we didn’t worry too much when we fell behind in games, as we usually did because we’d much rather play offense than defense.
The other friend was known for lightning-quick, no-look passes that often slipped through my hands if I could get a hand on them.
Still another Kaua‘i friend, whose sister-in-law worked with us at the Kaua‘i Times for a period, died by suicide at his home.
I found it incredibly difficult making two calls to grieving fathers who had lost children to suicide. Part of me is grateful that both politely declined to speak to me for the purpose of this story, because the last thing I wanted to do was to have them relive the shock and horror of losing a child, the pain of which is something I neither want nor can fathom.
Early on in my married life, a man told me that each day you can find a reason to split up, but what you need to do is find reasons to stay together.
Maybe a corollary for those in pain is that every day one can probably find a reason to commit suicide, but what is needed is to find a reason to keep living.
• Paul C. Curtis, assistant editor and staff writer, can be reached at 245-3681 (ext. 224) or pcurtis@kauaipubco.com.
