Janine Anderson – Special to The Garden Island Sometimes, a hug’s not enough. A kiss isn’t enough. A hair tussle, a hand-hold, a tickle. Not enough, not enough, not enough. They’ll suffice, but it’s not what he wants. What he
Janine Anderson – Special to The Garden Island
Sometimes, a hug’s not enough.
A kiss isn’t enough. A hair tussle, a hand-hold, a tickle. Not enough, not enough, not enough.
They’ll suffice, but it’s not what he wants.
What he wants is The Big X.
The Big X takes the entire body, from head to toes, and the longest stretch of space you can find.
I have no idea where The Big X came from. It just appeared one day.
“Big X,” said the 2-year-old. “Big X.”
Which, in 2-year-old speak, sounds an awful lot like “Big Ox.”
Now, Henry knows quite a few of his animals, but ox? I don’t think that’s in the repertoire.
When I looked at him, he had his arms stretched out in a big V over his head.
Then I got it. X. Not ox. X.
“Big X, Mama,” he said.
So I made one. Arms up overhead, legs out.
He laughed and ran toward me, crashing into my legs in hysterics.
“Big X hug!”
Then he ran back to do it again. And again. And again.
He keeps asking for them. Once every day or two, he pulls out the Big X.
It’s a hug of exuberance.
This is one of the great joys of living with a toddler. He’s got no thought of whether or not he should give a hug or a kiss, to say hello or goodbye, to ask someone to play.
He just does it.
At some point in our transition from toddler to child to grown-up, it seems like we lose that. We worry about what others might think of us if we reach out, instead of just reaching out.
The weeks from Thanksgiving to New Year’s always remind me of how much joy comes from being together. People make time for each other. The weather gets cold and the days get shorter, and it’s so easy to retreat into a cozy house.
This season of holidays helps us break out of that. It’s easy to find a reason to get out, to connect with our loved ones and friends. We buy and make gifts, invite people over for dinner, throw parties.
After Jan. 1, it takes a bit more effort. The calendar doesn’t provide us with ready-made reasons to open our houses and hearts. That’s no reason not to do it.
It’s like Henry’s Big X. He doesn’t need a crazy, giant hug. But, man, is it fun.
• Mommy Talk is written by reporters Marci Laehr Tenuta and Janine Anderson. Reporter Mike Moore writes Daddy Talk. Their columns run in a three-week rotation and can be found online at www.journaltimes.com/mom. Laehr Tenuta has three children, two boys and a girl. Moore and Anderson each have one son.
